bubs about town - Diaries

Trying to Conceive

Ok, Ben wasn’t stoked, especially since we had just agreed to keep our little bundle of joy news between ourselves for a while....but I’m sure he’ll get over it....although I do promise not to mention it to anyone else until we have passed our ‘safe point’.

So the next day after spending the morning gardening (perhaps some early nesting kicking in?), I have two friends over with their little toddlers and one is heavily pregnant with number two and gleefully explaining the next step of her pregnancy and the latest woes and worries and I’m bursting to tell my news but a glance from Ben reminds me of my promise so instead I quietly plan how I will announce my news in a few weeks time and wonder whether they will guess when I decline a wine at our regular girly nights out.

A routine trip to the loo then makes me pause; some light spotting has appeared, though easily put down to my exertions in the garden earlier in the day and nothing to worry about surely....

After farewelling my girlfriends I take a quick minute to check online and read its quite common to have what’s called ‘implant bleeding’ in the early days so worries aside I start to tackle the nightly routine, dinner, bath, wrestling a toddler into his pyjamas, stories and cuddles.

However, just before my son’s bedtime I start to feel some cramping and rush to the loo....so from here it doesn’t look good right? Poor little man gets unceremoniously thrown into bed with a distracted kiss and Ben and I are straight onto the internet and busy reading through pregnancy websites and chat room experiences.... it could be hopeful....

When things get worse we ring GP access to get some advice and get told to head to the local ED department immediately. Now we are in a dilemma as we don’t have family close by and all our closest friends are pregnant and I couldn’t bear putting them through this so I leave Ben at home to watch over little man and to ring my boss to let them know I won’t be in tomorrow (I mean either way who is up for work after a day/night like that!) I head to Belmont ED and try to stem the flow of emotions...

OK, you can probably guess what happens next, after an unbearable wait in the waiting room, having to explain what is happening to the on call nurse (male, in a large busy room....mmmmm comfortable!) I am told my blood tests from the previous day have been reviewed and found to have low HCG levels, so if that was yesterday what does that mean today? After another set of blood tests which will be back tomorrow and a chat with a lovely understanding doctor I head home with a heavy heart and little hope. I have to go back tomorrow to get blood tests results and possibly a scan so who knows what will happen next.

The Doctor

Well it has taken a week to get into the doctor and not even our own doctor as she has moved back to Sydney, where’s the love? Changing doctor’s is not ideal when you are resistant to change as I am, I mean I bonded with my last doctor, she was lovely and always so interested in our little man, but nothing to be done about it now, so off we go to meet the person now in charge of keeping our little family healthy....

Now if a change of doctor wasn’t bad enough Ben couldn’t make it to the appointment so it was just me and ‘little man’ who is always a patient and calm toddler in the waiting room......was the sarcasm obvious? Since they took the toys away from the waiting room (swine flu fears) waiting is not as relaxed as it used to be. It doesn’t matter how many toys I bring it’s not as engaging as taking off up the hallway to the toilets or singing his favourite songs at the top of his lungs or climbing up on the chairs to see the passing traffic. So after a stressful 45 minutes we make it into the room and thankfully there is a large digger stacked with blocks in the corner, with ‘little man’ well occupied we got down to business.

It’s all really straight forward, blood tests to check HCG levels, a dating scan to pinpoint a due date and a referral to an obstetrician and ten minutes later and we are all done. Even though I’m reasonably sure we are only 5 weeks along (give or take a couple of days) I can’t keep it in, I have to tell someone so after arranging a dating scan, the first obstetrician appointment and getting the first blood test I quickly text my mum, and three closest friends! Oh oh what will Ben say?
 

The Aftershock and X-Ray Worries

So after Ben finally got some colour back in his face we got on with our nightly routine. What a change from the first time we found out we were pregnant, being able to sit, cuddle, talk about our plans, make to do lists etc....all completely impossible at this time of night until number one is safely tucked up in bed and the dishes are done, toys tidied away and washing is out.

When we finally do manage to sit and talk I can’t help thinking that maybe we shouldn’t be too overconfident as it’s still very early and so much can go wrong. That’s when Ben works out the dates and drops a bombshell, the day we think we conceived is the day he had 12 X-rays, what will that mean?

After a quick call to a radiographer friend stating a ‘hypothetical situation’ we are relieved to find out that there is nothing to worry about on that score....so back to being cautiously happy. We decide not to tell anyone until we get abit further along and start to quietly get excited and make vague plans of bedrooms, a big boy bed for number one and a head start on potty training. Lets see what the trip to the doctor will bring.


Wow I think it worked...

Is it too soon to get excited? I’m a day late......my body feels different.....or does it? Am I looking for signs that just are not there or am I feeling more tired than usual and are my breasts really aching or do they usually feel like that? I thought we had missed the window a couple of weeks ago, only one way to find out.....easier said than done though with a very inquisitive toddler who is learning all about the toilet and has no concept of privacy. So after waiting for that peaceful time in the middle of the day when my son has finally and completely worn himself out enough to sleep I get the chance to do the test.

Unbelievably, it’s positive, the line was faint but definitely there, what to do now? I was so convinced that there was no chance now I’m completely blown away. After a half hour of jumping up and down and then following that lying down for half an hour (ridiculous behaviour don’t worry I know this!)

The next question was how to tell Ben? Last time he was there while the test was done so this time I popped it into a box and left it on the counter. As usual paying no attention to anything around him he didn’t notice the box, so after a couple of hours I finally handed it to him and watched his face go from excited to terrified all in a few seconds.....now what do we do?


Is Everyone Pregnant?

Is it just me or has anyone else found that the minute they start trying for a baby every second person they see is pregnant? I remember feeling the same way when I was pregnant with my son and although never mean spirited, I did suffer some belly jealousy which is a very common condition...I hope!